The Rambles of a waking Lamb

Life is made up of four little letters but it expands beyond the letter that describe it. Life contains the living and nonliving alike. It can be felt, heard, seen and expressed. Yet, it can never be stopped. The fabric of experience is perpetually growing by the consciousness of life itself. Projected out through the eyes of those embracing the awareness of its own existence within life keeps the creation of life expanding. This is the power of life. It is the expansiveness of its growth being renewed over and over again in a cyclical pattern of awareness. It is why we feel life repeats itself. With each repetition we grow in our self awareness of life.

We are the shapers of life. We are the ones who give the gift of sight to life. How do we see beyond the here and now? We see through life, deep into life and down into the heart of life. When we stay in a state of projecting out into life we act as unconscious beings responding to mere stimuli. Whether its feelings, other people, or events, when we just act, we’re only acting on impulse. In those situations we’re no better than the beasts we fear out in the jungles of the world. Instead, we have the ability to see into life, into the life inside us all, in order to see back out through the eyes of awareness. This gives us more than 20/20 vision. It gives us in-sight, fore-sight, and above all eternal sight.

Life is the gift of knowing we are alive! I am alive. And when I see through the eyes of life, I see nothing else matters but loving the gift of life. I love my life. I love the struggle. I love the growth. I love what I see when I overcome the lack of seeing. I am beast and God. I’m spirit and earth. I’m perfect in my imperfection. I am faith and doubt. I am love and fear. But most of all, I am guided by the eyes that see me as life. I am guided by love.

At the end of the day, no matter how heart broken, how hurt, how much I may want to give in and quit, I pick myself up and move forward beyond the grave and into life. And when I do, I drink from only one glass, the glass of love.

For all I feel, I respond only to love. No matter how much I may want to lash out at someone for betraying me, I don’t act. I surrender to the love in my heart. I love them over my own feelings. Because when day breaks, all I see is life shining up over the horizon of darkness. I know in my darkness if I’m patient in love I will see again.

We are the growing pains of life recognizing itself. And not all of us get it, yet. What a gift to be able to look in the mirror and see life in our own eyes looking back at us. And what a greater gift to let go and feel the love in our own eyes, looking back at us. What a gift to know that love isn’t ours but every ones. We have the ability to give the very force of life to others without condition, the gift of love. To know that love is not an expression of life, it is the very force of life’s own existence, is to be alive in the awareness of life. The value of loving another is not in self seeking reward, but in selfless honor of life.

Life is not about finding love. It is love. Love doesn’t make us complete. It makes us alive. I am alive through the love in my heart. I am love. So it goes without saying that I will not deny love. I will honor life through the love I give. I will give myself over to life and in this process I will be the love I feel, not the emotion of love, but the life of love.

I will strive to not act on what I feel, but only on the love that is felt in life. Without fail, I love every person in my life. I may be imperfect in expression of love, but I am perfect in the life I am a part of in love. I’ve been hurt, scarred, taken a beating, but I look inside my heart and all I feel is love. And in this love comes a clarity that I don’t see in the world. I don’t see it because it can only be seen through the eyes of life. It doesn’t exist in the world. It exists in the life we carry in our hearts. It stirs through the life force of love. This clarity is expressed through forgiveness and compassion. It’s calming. It brings tears of relief and love. And it renews faith. It quiets doubt and strengthens hope. It is what makes us alive.

I am alive in love. When I put my hand to my chest and I feel my beating heart, it’s not enough to know I’m alive. When I look inside and feel my heart, I feel every ounce of love I have for every person in my life and it brings tears to my eyes. I feel for them. I am with them in love.

People say love hurts. No, it doesn’t. It’s a disconnection between us and love that hurts. It’s the moment we forget we’re alive that we believe love hurts. I’ve never been hurt in love. I’ve only been hurt out of love. And in this hurt I have questioned my life.

It’s without a connection to love that we abandon life. We begin to focus on life from the outside of love. We see through the eyes of the world and all the world shows us is hurt, fear, doubt and pain. The world isn’t alive on its own. Its only alive through life and in love and we are life’s expression of love. If we give up on life, what is there to see? Without life there is no love and without love there is no life. The two go hand and hand. Without either there is only existence. And what is that? A rock exists but doesn’t have life on its own. It’s our life that gives it life. It’s our love that gives it love. We are not creatures of existence. We are human beings living the very existence of love. We are the expression of love through and in life. We are life discovering itself. We are life itself loving itself. We are living beyond mere existence –we are living awareness.

I have found that the greatest moments of clarity do not come from contentment but from the release of suffering. This tells me something. It tells me we aren’t meant to live a perfect life. We are meant to discover the value of imperfection. To accept what is because what is always changes. Life is never done. It’s a work of art in perpetual transition. We are always growing and every moment is a moment of opportunity. It’s a moment to let go and forgive ourselves, others, and move on in the purest direction of love. In doing so, we align with life inside us, with the heart and spirit of who we are when we look inward to live the outward expression of love. We are life and the value of that life is not found in what we do for ourselves but in what we give for the greater of life. The value is in what we do for family, friends, community, for life surrounding us. And sometimes in order to honor and do for others we must do with or do without for ourselves.

People talk about the sacrifice of love. Yet, there is no true sacrifice in love. Love is always full because as said before it is the very force of life. Love can’t be separated or reasoned out. It can’t be rationalized –it’s beyond logic because it isn’t self contained in the mind. It is alive. Again, it’s the force that gives us life. Without love all we have is thought and impulse.

Yet, love can show itself through reason. Love can be given through logic, but it can’t be rationalized into separate corners of life through black or white reasoning and it can’t be thought into nonexistence. The only way love can disappear from us is if we choose to disconnect from it. After all, we choose how we live life. We choose whether we just exist or actually live in it.

The only sacrifice we can make is one where we sacrifice self seeking pleasure for authentic love. To know that in life we get the greatest of all gifts when we give the greatest gift we can give for love. When we give of our selves, we get beyond our selves. This is to be cherished and honored above all else. We are not self contained units marching around this planet seeking only what we feel we deserve. No, we are interconnected life beings who live and flourish from knowing ourselves in love. We are the greatest expression of love –we are life living and giving beings.

I am not here to serve me. I am here to serve in and for life. And through the eyes of love I see beyond what the world sees. I see every living entity on this planet as a part of me in love. And I find the greatest comfort of all in that realization of life.

Four little letters. What do we call it? Life that’s what we call it when we name it in love.